I am so tired of waiting. Seriously. Let's get this show on the road!
Priority 1: Privateer Press needs to make a decision.
P-2: I need to take the GRE.
P-3: Ryan and I need to decide what city we're going to live in.
P-4: I need to find a new job.
P-5: I need to go to grad school for Elementary Education.
All of those things are contingent upon priority #1!!!!!
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
One thing I will never understand
Changing tastebuds: I've recently been experimenting with my "habit foods". By default, when I'm hungry and don't want to eat out, I eat cereal or chicken patties. For breakfast, I usually go for a bagel and cream cheese. Coffee is my main source of caffeine. Last week, I went for oatmeal, just to see if it's been "seven years" since my tastebuds decided they didn't like oatmeal. This week, I'm trying tea. So far, I've been successful in enjoying both of these things. Though, I'm still not a fan of lettuce on sandwiches or mayo in general or onions on anything.
When I'm hungry and I just have to go out to eat, I usually end up at a sushi place, Olive Garden or Sonny's. And when I go to those places I get either salmon or chicken and broccoli in some form. I've tried other meals to no avail. How do I know when it's been long enough to be able to enjoy something I never enjoyed previously?
That is all.
When I'm hungry and I just have to go out to eat, I usually end up at a sushi place, Olive Garden or Sonny's. And when I go to those places I get either salmon or chicken and broccoli in some form. I've tried other meals to no avail. How do I know when it's been long enough to be able to enjoy something I never enjoyed previously?
That is all.
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
2nd grade
Today, instead of the normal daily grind (secretary extraordinaire), I spent the day in Mrs. Oak's second grade classroom. I was the most enthusiastic and eager to learn temporary teacher's assistant there ever was! I patiently helped kids make puppets, repeated myself 30 times telling kids to sit down or help their neighbors, I led the line of 20 children to lunch and was at the end of the line running the kids in after reccess. I ate lunch in the teacher's lounge (ooooohhhh) and I helped monitor the children at a school assembly (aaaahhh).
My friend Rachel introduced me to her mom a couple of years ago and then suggested that I sit in on her classroom one day to see if I'd like being a teacher. Mrs. Oaks is very sweet and motivating. She helped answer my questions and calm most of my fears and/or nervousness I had about leading a classroom. Her curriculum, though mandated by Duval County, is presented creatively. The children admire and respect her.
There are parts of me that are still unsure about entering into an educational career and part of me that is ready to jump right in. Let's face it, I've been kicking the idea around since about a month after I graduated, but for some reason never made the decision to go for it. After wasting 2 years being a banker and a secretary, I think I may have finally found what I am truly interested in.
In other news, after hearing the devastating diagnosis from All Pro Imports that my car is worthless and will! die! very! soon! I took my car in for a second opinion at Jerry Bush Auto. I spent a fraction of the $10,000 worth of work that All Pro quoted and got everything necessary fixed with much friendlier service. The car makes NO SOUNDS!!! I'm in heaven! I can hear the radio without any extra rattles and creaks in the background. I can drive with the windows down and not be embarrassed to go over bumps! I'm somewhat broke with the still expensive cost of the repairs, but I don't have to buy a new car.
The stress of the last few days has melted considerably and I am once again hopeful and positive about the future.
My friend Rachel introduced me to her mom a couple of years ago and then suggested that I sit in on her classroom one day to see if I'd like being a teacher. Mrs. Oaks is very sweet and motivating. She helped answer my questions and calm most of my fears and/or nervousness I had about leading a classroom. Her curriculum, though mandated by Duval County, is presented creatively. The children admire and respect her.
There are parts of me that are still unsure about entering into an educational career and part of me that is ready to jump right in. Let's face it, I've been kicking the idea around since about a month after I graduated, but for some reason never made the decision to go for it. After wasting 2 years being a banker and a secretary, I think I may have finally found what I am truly interested in.
In other news, after hearing the devastating diagnosis from All Pro Imports that my car is worthless and will! die! very! soon! I took my car in for a second opinion at Jerry Bush Auto. I spent a fraction of the $10,000 worth of work that All Pro quoted and got everything necessary fixed with much friendlier service. The car makes NO SOUNDS!!! I'm in heaven! I can hear the radio without any extra rattles and creaks in the background. I can drive with the windows down and not be embarrassed to go over bumps! I'm somewhat broke with the still expensive cost of the repairs, but I don't have to buy a new car.
The stress of the last few days has melted considerably and I am once again hopeful and positive about the future.
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
a prayer
Hello Lord,
It has been sometime since I have whole-heartedly, unblinkingly, without reservation given you all my thoughts, hopes, dreams and faith; and even longer still since I've felt the connection to you that once was in my heart. In the time that has passed, so much has happened that I should have turned to you for guidance and faith to get through.
Lately, I have felt more than a little lost. My life feels full of unknown variables and blurry next steps. There are things that I whole-heartedly desire and things that I whole-heartedly want to be free of once and for all. Please help me come back to you, so that I can remember what it feels like to have my life in turmoil, but my core beliefs unshakeable.
Amen.
Sara Groves always said it best.
"Hello Lord"
Hello Lord, it's me your child
I have a few things on my mind
Right now I'm faced with big decisions
And I'm wondering if you have a minute, cuz
Right now I don't hear so well
And I was wondering if you could speak up
I know that you tore the veil
So I could sit with you in person
And hear what you're saying but
Right now, I just can't hear you.
I don't doubt your sovereignty
I doubt my own ability to
Hear what you're saying
And to do the right thing
And I desperately want to do the right thing
But right now I don't hear so well
And I was wondering if you could speak up
I know that you tore the veil
So I could sit with you in person
And hear what you're saying but
Right now, I just can't hear you.
And somewhere in the back of my mind
I think you are telling me to wait
And though patience has never been mine
Lord, I will wait to hear from you
Oh Lord, I'm waiting on you
Right now I don't hear so well
And I was wondering if you could speak up
I know that you tore the veil
So I could sit with you in person
And hear what you're saying but
Right now, I think you're whispering
It has been sometime since I have whole-heartedly, unblinkingly, without reservation given you all my thoughts, hopes, dreams and faith; and even longer still since I've felt the connection to you that once was in my heart. In the time that has passed, so much has happened that I should have turned to you for guidance and faith to get through.
Lately, I have felt more than a little lost. My life feels full of unknown variables and blurry next steps. There are things that I whole-heartedly desire and things that I whole-heartedly want to be free of once and for all. Please help me come back to you, so that I can remember what it feels like to have my life in turmoil, but my core beliefs unshakeable.
Amen.
Sara Groves always said it best.
"Hello Lord"
Hello Lord, it's me your child
I have a few things on my mind
Right now I'm faced with big decisions
And I'm wondering if you have a minute, cuz
Right now I don't hear so well
And I was wondering if you could speak up
I know that you tore the veil
So I could sit with you in person
And hear what you're saying but
Right now, I just can't hear you.
I don't doubt your sovereignty
I doubt my own ability to
Hear what you're saying
And to do the right thing
And I desperately want to do the right thing
But right now I don't hear so well
And I was wondering if you could speak up
I know that you tore the veil
So I could sit with you in person
And hear what you're saying but
Right now, I just can't hear you.
And somewhere in the back of my mind
I think you are telling me to wait
And though patience has never been mine
Lord, I will wait to hear from you
Oh Lord, I'm waiting on you
Right now I don't hear so well
And I was wondering if you could speak up
I know that you tore the veil
So I could sit with you in person
And hear what you're saying but
Right now, I think you're whispering
Friday, April 4, 2008
get this girl some alcohol!
It has seriously been one hell of a week for me at work and at home. Monday was chaotic just because it was Monday. Tuesday and Wednesday, the department had a candidate visiting and I was in charge of his itinerary. I can never, ever keep up with where a candidate is at, not even in a perfect world! I spent those days in meetings and chasing after the candidate. Then Thursday I toiled painfully through a rather daunting task. It took me nearly the entire day to get through it and at 3:00 I completely pissed off the Chairman. Lovely. That day ended in some tears and frustration. I held it together the best I could and kept my head down until I waas free at 4:00.
It is now Friday. Thank you Jesus for getting me here today. I can't even begin to explain how mentally exhausted I am feeling this morning. A typical Friday consists of the bare minimum of work and a mindset of "let me just get through the day". This Friday, I am elbow deep in work that was neglected for the busyness of the past 4 days.
As far as I know, Ryan and I don't have any solid plans for the weekend and that is okay by me. If I spent the entire weekend on the couch playing Super Smash Brothers Brawl, taking naps and reading, I'd be happy as a pig in mud.
It is now Friday. Thank you Jesus for getting me here today. I can't even begin to explain how mentally exhausted I am feeling this morning. A typical Friday consists of the bare minimum of work and a mindset of "let me just get through the day". This Friday, I am elbow deep in work that was neglected for the busyness of the past 4 days.
As far as I know, Ryan and I don't have any solid plans for the weekend and that is okay by me. If I spent the entire weekend on the couch playing Super Smash Brothers Brawl, taking naps and reading, I'd be happy as a pig in mud.
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
tuesday feels like monday feels like rain
Me: Does anyone else feel like today has felt like a second Monday?
April: Yes! I can hardly stand one Monday, much less two!
About 2 Mondays a month, we have seriously hectic days, where it feels like someone turned the office upside down and shook it really hard before turning it rightside up again. Yesterday was one of those Mondays and today followed in its wake with just as much chaos. We had a faculty candidate coming to interview today. Like always, I arranged all of his travel, hotel and itinerary and crossed my fingers, praying that things would go as smoothly as possible. His flight got cancelled once, then delayed. His appointments all had to be rearranged. The entire office felt topsy-turvy, while I balanced his itinerary with the help of Nora and the rest of my job.
By the time I got home this afternoon, at nearly 6:00pm, I felt ragged. I'm afraid of what tomorrow holds, but I guess a fast-paced busy couple of days is better than endlessly, hopelessly slow days.
In other news, today is April 1. Ryan has officially turned in his application as of 3 days ago. I have this feeling like every day until we hear something, anything is going to be agonizingly painful. I've been thinking only positive thoughts about what could happen in the next month or so. It has been refreshing to think of something that I actually want to do whole-heartedly, rather than falling onto new places or hopes for lack of anything better to look forward to. Either way, July 28 is the last day in this apartment and we're off on a new adventure, maybe in Gainesvlle, maybe in Seattle or maybe in Orlando.
April: Yes! I can hardly stand one Monday, much less two!
About 2 Mondays a month, we have seriously hectic days, where it feels like someone turned the office upside down and shook it really hard before turning it rightside up again. Yesterday was one of those Mondays and today followed in its wake with just as much chaos. We had a faculty candidate coming to interview today. Like always, I arranged all of his travel, hotel and itinerary and crossed my fingers, praying that things would go as smoothly as possible. His flight got cancelled once, then delayed. His appointments all had to be rearranged. The entire office felt topsy-turvy, while I balanced his itinerary with the help of Nora and the rest of my job.
By the time I got home this afternoon, at nearly 6:00pm, I felt ragged. I'm afraid of what tomorrow holds, but I guess a fast-paced busy couple of days is better than endlessly, hopelessly slow days.
In other news, today is April 1. Ryan has officially turned in his application as of 3 days ago. I have this feeling like every day until we hear something, anything is going to be agonizingly painful. I've been thinking only positive thoughts about what could happen in the next month or so. It has been refreshing to think of something that I actually want to do whole-heartedly, rather than falling onto new places or hopes for lack of anything better to look forward to. Either way, July 28 is the last day in this apartment and we're off on a new adventure, maybe in Gainesvlle, maybe in Seattle or maybe in Orlando.
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