cruise cruise cruise

Last Thursday, Ryan and I returned from our cruise. Without a doubt, cruising with my sweet Ryan was the best vacation I have ever had!

The trip started out in a high stress way that could only be the best kick-off to the most relaxing 5 days ever. We planned to leave early enough to be at the airport an hour early. After getting a camera from my brother and getting lost in Orlando, we got to the airport and parked the car 16 minutes before our plane was scheduled to depart. We ran through the parking lot, tossed out our shampoo, conditioner, shaving cream, brand new sunscreens and face wash, carried on our baggage, ran through the airport and sat down in our seats 2 minutes before the (or a lincoln) to the port, but what did it matter when we were about to get onto the "Enchantment of the Seas" for a week.

Throughout the entire vacation, I was completely relaxed (at least once we got on the ship). All thoughts of work, school and life in general completely disintegrated as soon as we crossed the line between port terminal and ship.

The food was absolutely amazing. We had a wonderful dinner every night, served to us by a series of waiters. There was an appetizer, a main course, wine, breads and dessert every single night. We had frozen yogurt on tap, buffets for breakfast and lunch and snacks whenever we wanted.

The basic run down of each day of vacation went something like this:

10:00-11:00am - roll out of bed, eat breakfast

11:00-4:30 - any of the following: wander around the ship, go on an excursion, go to the casino, watch a show

5ish - watch movies and take a nap with ryan

8:30-11:30 - dinner

11:30 - go to jacuzzi and pool

2ish - end the night with movies and cuddling

One night, Ryan and I laid out on the deck.We both brought books, but Ryan was the only one who did any reading. I laid down and just stared at the stars. The ship was peaceful and the sky was beautiful. Seriously, you haven't seen the moon until you've looked at it shimmering across the ocean in the middle of the night with nothing else visible in the distance for miles.

Coming back to work was a complete nightmare compared to how wonderful the cruise was. Life after the cruise has been quite mundane. It is hard to look forward to five days a week, 7:30-4:00, when there is a life out there of fun and peace. I have never known what it is like to be completely stress free. I made the lethal mistake of checking email and voicemail while we were waiting for our flight. All reality rushed back to me in a flood of stress at killer strength.

Anyway, some pics to enjoy:

scream.

I am ridiculously excited for Saturday. This will be a trip of firsts. This will be the first time for Ryan and I to fly, vacation and cruise together. It will be the first cruise either of us has gone on.

Since it is our first, of course I am working on adding gray streaks to my hair. I have been worrying so much over this trip. Not that I am afraid anything bad will happen, more that I am afraid I will forget some important detail that should have been attended to weeks ago. I am worried that we won’t have enough time to have lunch with Laney and get on the boat and settled. I am worried that we will go on a boring excursion. In short, I am worried. I am not worried, though, about my constant worry. This is what I do. I freak out about things I am unsure of and plan until there is nothing left to plan for.
I don’t know when I became such an obsessive planner. When there are factors that are left unknown, I fill the spaces with all the other possible factors and questions. The result is that I am so exhausted from all the worry that I hardly have the energy to enjoy whatever it was that I planned.

In other news, for our anniversary Ryan and I bought a Wii. It may have been an irresponsible splurge, but good God is it fun! Nintendo really came up with something special when they brought Mario into the world. He has so many fun times, he parties, he hangs out in space, he fights villains, he has a ton of friends; Mario is just an all-around fun-loving guy!

Today is blood donating day for me. My goal is to reach the double-digit galloneer status. Eight donations equals 1 gallon and so far with LifeSouth I have donated 9 or 10 times. I have the mug and the license plate. I feel like this is the one real way that I can contribute to the community where I know the service is used for the right purpose. It’s hard to tell where donated money or items will go. The salvation army helps those in need of jobs, but the clothes, shoes, etc that are donated don’t necessarily go to those who need it most. Money donated could go anywhere. It could get used for purposes that are not necessarily for the good of the needy, but for the good of those who control the flow. It is difficult for me to picture someone’s blood being given to the wrong person or wasted.

my love.

It truly breaks my heart some mornings to get out of bed. Because getting out of bed, isn’t just a matter of breaking the wonderful cycle of R.E.M., it’s more a matter of shutting the alarm off as quickly as possible so as not to wake my sleeping honey. Following 3 snoozes (yes, people, I need 3 snoozes), it’s a slow and careful prying of myself out of Ryan’s arms. Move an arm here, a leg there, while gently pulling my hair out from underneath his shoulders.
It doesn’t matter where I’m going or why, when I wake up wrapped up in his embrace I can’t seem to look forward to the rest of the day. Once I’m out of bed, I find myself drifting back to just be near him in the hopes that he’ll sense me there and instinctively pull me back in. Trying to resist is futile. He is my big bear, snuggle-butt.
We are fast-approaching our 3 year anniversary. Birthdays are for celebrating the person, anniversaries are for celebrating the relationship, at least in my mind. I am a big fan of going all out for birthdays. His birthday falls in July and I rack my brain for a month trying to come up the! best! gift! This year’s gift was a smash, but now my brain is fresh out of ideas for our anniversary.
We will be back from the cruise 3 days before our anniversary, so it isn’t exactly justifiable to go out of town to celebrate. There is the traditional dinner at Stonewood, but what gift can I give him? Oy.

ding ding ding.

The time has come to make changes, instead of just wishing for them.

I have recently decided that my constant wavering of decisions has gotten me nowhere. I believe that I am very capable of making a very good, solid plan when it comes to the possibilities my future could hold. I can even hold on to those plans for days, weeks, months, even, at a time. The downside is that I am also very capable of carefully picking apart those well-laid plans until there is nothing left to stand on. I bring my hopes up high, then tear them down sadistically.
My first tackle at this sadistic behavior has been purchasing a piano and researching teachers. I am bound and determined to learn to play it. Jackie and Luke helped Ryan and I move the damn thing into the apartment. We had to lay it on its back, which made me cringe over every bump. Some of the keys were not exactly working and it is very much out of tune after the move. I was really afraid that it was irreparable.
Last night, Dan the Piano man came over to fix the issues. Have you ever seen the inside of a piano, more than just opening the lid? I watched him work for about an hour, completely mesmerized as I learned how the whole thing works. He was a rather chatty man and had no issues explaining the process or showing me the keys and the hammers and all the things that make it a piano.
Tonight, I am having coffee with a possible piano teacher. She seems very nice and very experienced with piano. Hopefully, by Christmas I will have some reasonable amount of skills to show off after Christmas dinner.
Ryan and I have discussed, re-discussed and discussed further what our future might hold in terms of geography. It seems to change every day. However, a fairly do-able plan has been created in my mind and I intend to get somewhere with it, whatever the obstacles.

I am going back to school. It is official; I will be taking advantage of the free schooling that UF offers. Then I will be applying for another degree. Decisions have finally been made regarding my career path; no longer do I feel doomed to an office/desk life for the rest of my career. The classes that are required are a bit daunting, but hopefully I will survive.
Ryan has been very supportive. Though, I must admit, I am rather sad about the fact that I will continue to live in Gainesville until at least 2009. Yuck. As long as I don’t get to the point where I am stuck in Gainesville, I can live, but having kids here is just not for me. I want a bigger city, plain and simple.